How to Avoid Burnout as an Empath & Why We're Taking a Break

In this week's EA meeting, Danie and Crystina reflect on the challenges of balancing personal well-being with their passion for community and building the podcast. We discuss burnout, mental health struggles, and the importance of setting boundaries while remaining true to their mission. Sadly, Empaths Anonymoys will be going on a hiatus to preserve our mental health and return refreshed. As empaths, the need for self-care is even greater, especially for maintaining community and personal wellness.

In the meantime, follow us on TikTok where we will be sharing fun and vulnerable videos or commentary on pop culture and YouTube where we will be releasing Empaths React videos. 

00:00 Introduction and Welcome

00:32 What's in Your Cup?

01:09 Mental Health Check-In

03:19 Crystina's Struggle with OCD

05:44 Why we're taking a break for our friendship

08:01 Balancing Personal and Community Needs

15:41 Real-Time Growth and Healing

20:01 Conclusion and Farewell

We're excited to share a trailer for The Grad School Femtoring Podcast, hosted by Dr. Yvette Martinez-Vu. This award-winning show supports first-gen BIPOC students and professionals in navigating grad school, careers, and productivity in sustainable, values-aligned ways. Give it a listen and grab Yvette’s free Sustainable Productivity Playbook plus curated podcast playlist here: https://creative-trailblazer-5062.kit.com/29b17bb6a4

Transcript

empaths-anon_1_07-29-2025_115802: 0:00

I palo santo'd the fuck outta this bitch. Good. So we're, we're solid.

0:05

Welcome to Empaths Anonymous, a space for dreamers, healers, and feelers. Navigating the fine line between putting yourself first and holding space for others. If you struggle with balancing your needs while still supporting your tribe, then you're in the right place. Welcome to the support group.

empaths-anon_1_07-29-2025_115802: 0:25

Hi. Welcome to or welcome back to Empath's Anonymous podcast. I'm Danie. And I'm Crystina. And today we're gonna get into it, but first, what's in your cup, sister? What's in my cup is a tangerine. LaCroix. LaCroix. You guys, what's the actual way to say that here? Amazing. What's the actual way to say that? I don't know how to actually say the brand. LaCroix. LaCroix. Laqua. Laqua. Laqua. Yeah. I don't know. Laroy. I always say Laroy even though I know that's wrong, but I don't care. I think that is the American way. The typical American way to say it. Ooh, that's fresh. The Croix. Yeah, so that's what's in my cup. I feel like this whole episode, I mean, you know, because you're clicking on it, that this is gonna be just kind of a shorter mm-hmm. The whole episode, the what's in your cup, honestly, a little check-in. Right. Um, so what's in your cup? And then I guess we'll get into Right. Feels That's fair enough. I have a coffee made at home. Because I'm good and I don't need to go out and spend$8 every day. Yeah. Even though most of the time I do. Um, it's a Trader Joe's K-Cup with a little Laird vanilla and a dash of hazelnut.'cause I'm weaning myself off of the hydrogenated oils. Hmm. And still not working. What's not working? Me not being off of the hydrogenated oils. Oh. It's like I've been all the Trader Joe's meals. Girl. I know. I just saw TikTok the other day saying that like Trader Joe's isn't as healthy as they like market themselves to being like, oh, and I knew that. Yeah. And I knew that. We know that maybe some of the more fresh stuff, you know, why and in like the produce section aren't as bad, but like anything frozen, my guy always, I mean you're really, you're really having to look through those things. We just wanted to get on the couch and in the spirit of always being transparent about the journey that was part of the deal here let you guys in on how we're like. Actually doing and actually feeling because while we love all of the interviews that we do and the chance to talk about mental health and what's happening to the collective and our communities you just gotta be about it. Mm-hmm. Uh, when you set out on a mission or when renew, answer the call from the universe that like, this is what my purpose is supposed to be. And even just the purpose for the podcast, you have to then walk the way that you talk. Mm-hmm. And so who am I to sit on here with some of the most amazing therapists and dating experts and artists and creatives and people who are out there doing the work if I am struggling internally and mentally. Um, and so we just had to have, as we always do, some real ass conversations. Plural.'cause I think that we talked about this more than once. Oh, about at least once a week. Yeah. About just settling down because I've been very transparent always about my mental health journey and getting diagnosed with OCD and it's getting to the point where I'm really approaching my breaking point and it's getting pretty bad about this time a year ago. Yeah, when you guys are listening to this, it'll be pretty much a year. Um, I got laid off from my job and so that is kind of what triggered a lot of my OCD symptoms. And it got really bad then, and now I'm kind of approaching it there again. And so it's getting to a point where I can't ignore because it's. You know, weekly, if not daily or every other day, you know, spirals. And I'm waking up at three, four in the morning'cause I have anxiety and I can't go back to sleep. Um, and my brain is just lying to me and it's causing me to. Not really enjoy my life. Hmm. And that's not cool. No. To put it lightly and that's not a good time. It's not. No. Yeah. To make light of something that's actually very serious and can become debilitating. Right. You never, we never want like. Something like our podcast, which is supposed to be a creative outlet and something that's supposed to be fun. The work behind it all, at the end of the day, as we always say it is work. We never want that portion of it and that part of it to become like dreadful or something that we are not looking forward to doing. And so for protection of our mind, body, soul, this is the best choice for us. Right now. And I think that deciding on this was really hard because very, if you've been listening to us, um, since the beginning or even here recently, I think you can kind of pick up what we're putting down that like we care very deeply and and are perfectionist in our own right. And so we, we've a po a podcast about being an empath and we care deeply like, what the fuck? Why would you do that? Right? And so it's like our, we're emotionally involved and invest. Did, of course we are. Um, and so taking a break from something that you do love, even though it is hard it was a difficult choice. And I think we went back and forth with it for a long time until we finally just realized like, if we keep having this same conversation, I think we already know what the answer is. We just can't quite say it. And so this being an extended hiatus, probably the longest break we've taken thus far? I mean, we really only took a break for Christmas, right? We haven't really ever taken a break. I mean, it's only been a year, but you know what I mean? Yeah. Like we, uh, is two weeks really a break? I mean, I guess in our mind, in our mind, it was that, um, because when you're go, when you're going nonstop, yeah, two weeks can feel like somewhat of a break. But it wasn't a break enough for us to, actually rest and actually take time for ourselves and our individual endeavors and be able to kind of just process all the stuff that we've been talking about in this podcast that has happened to us in our lives individually and together in like the last two years. Right. Um, so I think that. If there was a time to do it, it has to be now. Or we are going to approach burnout as we've talked about before on this podcast. And like Crystina said, if we're not about it, everyone's gonna be able to tell.'cause we're not gonna be here on the green velvet couch as fully present or fully ourselves. And so that's not ever how we want to come across. Right. And I don't ever want. To come off as complaining. I feel like sometimes we get on here and we're like, the podcast, the podcast, the podcast, whatever. I love this probably more than anything right now. Like, not like my friends and family and like things like that, but just as far as the things that I'm working on, mm-hmm. This is number one for me. It's not that the podcast itself is taxing because I do enjoy it. It's the mental and emotional load that is becoming hard, especially when you are trying to protect your friendship. Mm-hmm. And you are trying to move about things in a way that is considerate of both people who are. Doing different things and on different trajectories. Mm-hmm. We're each gonna need different things and it's gonna look different for each of us, so mm-hmm. If that's always our priority. In general with anything that you know may be coming up in your life. If your priority in life is your relationships and making sure that your community and your people are good, it's always going to come with compromise and it's always going to come with some kind of, sacrifice, I guess is the best way to put it, is like you can't always put yourself first and what you want because everybody needs something a little bit different and everybody's life has something different going on. So I think that's my. Advice to anybody listening is that if you do have something in your life that is coming, you know, I wouldn't say coming in between, but something that you're working on with somebody, whether it's a friend, a partner, a loved one, whatever you're enjoying together. It's a business, it's a creative hobby, it's a project of any sort. There just really has to be so much love for each other and. Boundaries and a foundation that you can go off of. Mm-hmm. Um, so that when things come up or when things get tiring or when you know you're trying to motivate each other or keep encouraging each other, it's like you can go back to the foundation you established in the beginning and say. This is why we're doing things. This is how we're gonna treat each other. This is how we're gonna approach the work, right? Mm-hmm. I'm gonna put these in quotes'cause it's like, yes, the, like any kind of project is going to be work, but if it's something you love, it doesn't feel like work. Correct. And I think the biggest challenge moving from a individualistic way of living life into a more communal way of living is an adjustment that I think we don't really talk about as much. Like as a society, we're pushed to just only live our own individual lives. But when life and the universe pushes you into living as a community, you are like, okay. I don't really have that as an option anymore. Right. And so now it's nothing but considering the people around me and honestly, why wouldn't I wanna live that way? It's an ancestral way of living. It's like deeply rooted within us. Like these are, this is literally how humans were supposed to like survive is relying on one another. And so I think being able to move toward a more collective mindset. Hmm. Is not easy when you've lived your whole life the opposite way. And so yeah, you have to learn that like sacrifice and compromise are some of the things that are just like required. Right. Um, and because we're all doing it for each other, it shouldn't be this like taboo thing to talk about or have a conversation about. Yeah. And so, I think just being able to lean into that a little bit more and realize like, this is how we're meant to live and like rely on one another will help us come back refreshed and have like a reframing of how we want things to move forward in the future. Right. And it's always about being better so that we can feel better. Yeah. And become better. I'll also, not that I'm gonna counter it. Because two things can be true at once. Mm-hmm. It's like, yes, you have to consider others, but I mean, whether you're listening as an empath or a highly sensitive person, a deep feeler in general, we also have to put ourselves first. It's this very delicate balance and juggle. And so I was, you know, recently just brought back to our second guest ever, which was Nareen who. Shout out nre. We still keep in contact with her. She's the best. She's doing amazing work. at@nisrinemaktabi on Instagram, go follow her. She's starting to do like community circles, um, and a lot of awareness for what's happening in Gaza. So go follow her and see everything she has going on. But I found myself doing like the empath thing, as she said in our podcast, again, of, it's almost this like act of. You, you're telling yourself it's selflessness, but it's also like putting yourself on the back burner. Mm-hmm. And so it's a constant juggle of like, I do wanna consider the other people in my life, but if I'm always putting myself on the back burner, then I'm doing the thing that's gonna put me back in the empath loop. Mm-hmm. So how do I honor both? Right. I think is the, the biggest struggle. And for me, what it looked like was. Allowing myself to know that I can come to the table and say, this is how I am feeling. That's valid. And this is my opinion or my view on things. And the other person is also allowed to say, well, this is my, these are my feelings and this is my view on things. And so accepting the fact that like they can have their truth, I can have my truth and it's totally fine, and it doesn't mean that they don't value me. I think that that's the best place that you can get to as an empath is knowing that just because you're stating how you feel, and it doesn't change the situation, it doesn't mean that the other person thinks that you're feelings or your point of view is invalid, right? When all the feelings get shared and you have one big pot. Of mixed emotions of deep feeling. Fucking St. Stew, St yeah. Feeling stew. Um, whereas Rachel Ray called it a stoop. Bless her heart. I don't know what's going on with her. Where are you, Rachel? A lot of people are concerned for like her health'cause she's like really bloated and she seems to be like a little bit on the alcoholism. Oh yeah. As an aside, when you have the big pot of feelings, all those things are still true for each and every individual. And so those things can get mixed together a lot and get like a little bit muddy and feel like no one's hearing me or seeing me. Or understanding me. But I think like you're saying, coming to terms with the fact that like, I may not understand your lived experience because I have my own. You have your own. I think that setting the boundaries as an empath to being like, well, there's only so much that I can take on that's yours and that you can take on. That's mine, right? Yeah. So I think that those are the boundaries that we are trying to set. And then. Being in this capacity where it's like, you know, always together all the time and trying to figure this out and figure that out and figure this out, like it, that's the part that does become mentally taxing. And then before you know it, like we're running into these walls where we don't have time for ourselves. And that puts us right back in the loop, right? Mm-hmm. It's like, okay, well I could take this for you and I could take that for you and well, I'll take that for you and we could take this for each other. And it's a lot of like switch off and, and trade off. At the end of the day, like if we don't. Actually carve out time, like literally in the calendar and say, this day for this many hours is when I'm gonna do this for myself. We'll always choose the thing that we're both passionate about, which is the podcast because we always want it to be better and we're interested in growth and we want it to be. A community where everyone can come and feel seen and heard. But when we're not showing up as our best selves because we're being, you know, I guess rung dry in a way, then yeah, we're not gonna be that support system that we sought out to be. And so I think all this to say as we set out to do in the beginning, it's always gonna be real time growth and learning and healing like you are. Meeting us exactly where we're at every single time that we are on this couch. Like we didn't do all the work and then become like this enlightened or heightened version or higher self. Like all of this is real time. Like you're seeing us heal in real time. You're seeing us grow and learn and struggle in real time. And that was intentional. Yes, it was. That was on purpose. So they feel like, why are they explaining to us why they take a break? Just take a break, bitch. It's like, we're doing this because that was the purpose. Yeah. We're doing this because that's'cause we saw in the beginning that not everybody was giving the behind the scenes. It's like, you know, you see. Right. I don't know why she always comes to my mind, but like you see like a Mel Robbins or like a Brene Brown. Yeah. Right. Yeah. And you see them for who they are now. Right. I don't know who the fuck Brene Brown was when she was like 30. Yeah. Exactly. And doing the work. Yeah. And healing. They had, I only see the Brene Brown now. Yeah. They've had opportunities and I'm not saying I'm gonna be Brene Brown, but you know what I'm saying. We could be the, we could be the Brown Brene Browns. And she's had, you know. Years and, and experience and with, with experience and years comes wisdom. And so we're meeting her like with all this wisdom that she has, right? And with us we're just like, you're gonna meet me where the fuck I am. And so if it feels like we're overexplaining this because we want us, we want, take me how you motherfucking take me, literally, it's because we want to talk about the hard shit. Yeah. You know, we want to sit here and say like, not everything is fucking peaches and rainbows bitch. Like, and we're gonna show you why it's not. And so because we're showing you all this in real time, like each other, like us, we have to be okay with Right. The change and, and the flow and the redirection.'cause it's constant, right? And so I think we're learning how to let go of the rigidity of it all and actually. Really show up as our true and real self. So it's like, right, if I'm telling you what's in my cup, I actually have to be very honest and say like, I'm fucking tired. Yeah. Crystina's tired we're my brain. I was explaining to Danie the way, the best way that I can put it to people. When my OCD is flaring up is it feels like, you know when you go to the beach and you get in the waves, you're like, I can fucking handle it. And then the waves pick up and they're bigger than you anticipated and like it goes over you and then you get fucking rolled in the wave and then you're just like, it takes a couple wave cycles for you to like get back to the surface. That's how it feels. But in my brain, you know, that's the best way I can explain it to an outside person. Like my thoughts are getting fucking rolled in the waves and so yeah, I'm tired. I don't ever wanna say this to complain. I know that everybody has their own struggles, but I'm like, I don't really have much juice left. You know, like Lizzo says, like, I got the juice. I don't got the juice. I probably have like two sips of juice left. It's really the, the best choice that you can make for yourself are often the hardest ones. Hmm. Knowing that you're approaching this tipping point, like, you know, the, the teapot that's about to pour over and not in a good way'cause the boiling fucking hot water. And just understanding like, okay, I am getting to this point and I know that if I continue at the rate that I'm going, then something is gonna fall apart. And right now neither of us can afford. For that to be ourselves. Exactly. We can't, neither of us can afford to fall apart and for whatever different reasons they are, it just is not an option. Yeah. And so I think because going back to the communal part, we have more people than just us to consider. Yeah. At the end of the day, it's like. No matter what. Right? You have to take care of you because other people are relying on you. Right? And even if you're relying on yourself, like there's sometimes like parts of yourself that just like, oh, I could really rely on like this version of myself right now. Or, oh, I could really rely on like this part of myself right now, but if all the parts are being depleted, there's nothing to pull from really, and there's nothing to rely on. Yeah. We're still gonna be active. I wanna tie this up like Yeah. This doesn't mean we're going away. We're gonna release some replays for you guys of some of our favorite episodes of some of your favorite episodes that did the best. We're gonna show you some other podcasts that we love that are gonna be supported to you in your, you know, healing journey. Mm-hmm. So we're just to be posting things. It's just not gonna be like in real time, like us sitting down on the couch every week or so, like we normally are doing. Mm-hmm. So that's how it's gonna look different. Yeah. We're gonna have lots of conversations about the comeback after the hiatus because we want to show up as our full and honest and truthful selves. But in the meantime, while you are listening to those replays and you are being introduced to new people and new podcasts we are, uh. Very, very super active on TikTok. We're having a bunch of fun over there. Yeah. So if you guys wanna kind of keep up with our journey, we have lots of plans to kind of build up our community. On social media so that people get a better idea of like, who we are, our personalities, and basically give people a reason to want to listen to us. Right. Um, because as of right now, right, like we're still, in this lane of like trying to seek our community or having our community find us. We're very indie. We are, we're little indie. We're little indie babies. You know, we are. I, again, not trying to complain about how hard things are because it's like I would still choose this again and again. It's a peek behind the curtain of being like a small creative or like a, like a indie content creator of any form, is that when you don't already have the platform, it is a lot harder for you. And that's just the facts. And we started the podcast because we had some shit to say. Mm-hmm. And I think that for the last year, it's been what we needed mm-hmm. To get those things out, to learn to dive deeper, um, with each other, with ourselves, with our guests, with you guys. Mm-hmm. But yeah, we kind of realized like we have to spend time on building up. Community. Right. Attracting more feelers, connecting with you guys, showing you more of us and our life, which taking a break from the podcast is going to give us some more space. Mm-hmm. To do that because you wanna know what my life looks like right now, sitting in that damn fucking office chair right over there. For like, pretty much every day for like eight hours a day, or in my bed also working. So that's what my life looks like. So I can't show you my life'cause it's, I'm not doing anything besides working. Yeah. And it's, that's not cool because it, there's no matter what, there's all, like I said earlier, there's always gonna be something to work on because that's just how, it's just the nature of being an entrepreneur and she's a double entrepreneur, you know? And on top of like all of that, I'm balancing and like trying to be a, a good mom, you know. How, how and going to school and we have to make money, right? It's like there, there's nothing, there's nothing feasible. That I can take a break from other than the pod. And I think it's true for the both of us. And it's hard because it is our creative outlet and it is something we love doing. We love talking to people. We love amplifying black and brown voices and we're gonna continue to do that. Yes. but it's like there's just no space for us. And so we are also black and brown voices. So that's like, girl, you've gotta sit down like. Yeah, you've gotta sit down. You have to be able to have deeper conversations with yourself. Yeah, especially me who like shows my emotions and my feelings in like very different ways. I'm an internal processor, I don't always outwardly express. And so I know a lot of that is just suppression and so. If I keep allowing myself to be that way and suppressing emotions, I will also implode. So there are lots of reasons for why this is necessary. You can still find us online. We're gonna be active and we are going to be really making an effort to talk to everybody and engage in sincerity. So that's that. That's all I have to say. Yeah, just to close it all out. We do love you guys. We see the people that have been writing for us and that are listening and that are sharing our episodes and are engaging with us. I don't want to make you guys feel like we don't see it and appreciate it, so. I wanna put out there, we do love and care about you, and just a reminder to take care of yourself first, because kind of like in the episode we talked to Soko in is there's so much going on in the world. Mm-hmm. That if you don't take care of yourself, you have no business. Mm-hmm. What is she in the streets? What did she say? Like, sit the fuck down or something like that. Sit the fuck down. Yeah. She literally said, sit down girl. Right. And it's like you can't, you have to advocate for yourself.'cause you can't always just be an advocate for other people, especially when it's not coming from a place of having a full cup. Mm. So with that, let us pray. Spirit grant me, the serenity to listen to my intuition, the courage to make new choices even when they feel foreign. And as always, the wisdom to not read a bitch when they try me. Amen. And so it is. So it is. Bye.

26:14

Thanks for tuning in to this week's EA meeting. If you liked this episode, please share it with a friend and leave a five star rating and review on Apple or Spotify. We'd love to hear from you. You can follow us on Instagram and TikTok at empaths and on Pod. Don't forget to follow us wherever you listen to podcasts or subscribe to our YouTube channel and turn on the notification bell so you're the first to know when we release a new episode. We'll meet you back here on the green velvet couch. Next. Time. Bye feelers.