Fully Aligning to Your Authentic Self with Han Huante

TW: This episode discusses sensitive material such as suicidal ideation. Please take care of yourself and listen only if you have the capacity.

In this week's episode we have San Diego's resident unapologetic queen and fashion icon - Han Huante, the creator behind How I See It and host of How I See It podcast!

We have a very raw, relatable, and real chat about:
💋 Han's journey with anxiety and depression
💋 Getting comfortable with being uncomfortable
💋 Lessons learned through healing and the hard "be real with yourself" moment
💋 Becoming unapologetic and and living authentically

We are so grateful to Han for being so open about where she's been and where she's at now. We hope you guys enjoy the conversation and feel free to leave your questions or "AHA" moments in the comments!

Where to find Hannah:

Instagram
Podcast
Podcast IG
Website

00:00 Intro

01:03 This episode might look different...

03:36 What's In Your Cup!?

16:59 Introducing Hannah Huante

32:05 Problem Solving vs. Panic Mode

32:52 Therapy and Tough Love

35:56 Embracing Authenticity

38:24 Healing and Self-Reflection

44:57 Navigating Relationships and Boundaries

54:39 Sustainable Fashion Tips

01:00:56 Final Thoughts and Farewell

Transcript

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Han Huante 0:00

There's this victim mentality, or I'll say validation mentality. And I really struggled with this where I almost felt like if I let go. Or like of someone or something, or some event. Like if I let go and move on, then like who's gonna validate it? Like who's gonna validate that it happened? Yeah. Or like if I let go of this relationship, like who's gonna fix this person? Or if I let go of the thing that's keeping me super depressed and anxious. who's gonna say that? Like, I, I worked hard and that I, I deserve to be angry. And I think it just comes to a point where it's just like, who are you doing this for?

Empaths Anonymous 0:37

Welcome to Empath Anonymous, a space for dreamers, healers, and feelers. Navigating the fine line between putting yourself first and holding space for others. If you struggle with balancing your needs while still supporting your tribe, then you're in the right place. Welcome to the support group.

empaths-anon_2_04-01-2025_192454 0:58

Hey everyone. Welcome back to the Empaths Anonymous podcast. I'm Danie. And I'm Crystina. And we have the best news ever and exciting news. We recorded our first ever. The history of the podcast in person interview, we did. You guys, I didn't know what she was about to say right now. I was like, what are you announcing? Am I pregnant? How do I know if I'm pregnant? How do I know if I'm pregnant? We have so many things coming up that I'm like, what is she about to say right now? What is she gonna announce? I know. Ooh, that's kind of like a hint for you guys, but you're not gonna know. Yeah. How will they know? Yeah. Our first ever in person. Interview. Mm-hmm. It just kind of worked out perfectly. The stars aligned, so it really did. We were in her hood. Mm-hmm. Doing some things that you don't know yet, and you will soon and you will see. We'll see. Absolutely. Yeah. And that is with the beautiful, talented, gorgeous, smart Han Huante of how I see it. Podcast. And we're gonna get into it and we're gonna introduce her in a second, but first. What's in your cup, sister? I have a new flavor alert, new flavor alert, mixy flavor. It's the, sorry, I just tried to not burp in the microphone. It's very fizzy. The new grapefruit tangerine, nixy. So I'm just having some of that. It's good. I'm having a sip. You, you do have to be a grapefruit girly, I'll tell you that. It's very group grapefruit forward. It is not very much tangerine. It is quite, it's just quite a hint. Yes. So they do mean what they say. Yeah. Yeah. And how are you showing up? How are you feeling? I'm showing up. Good. I, yeah, that's how I'm showing up. Like, where do I start? Where do I start? Right? Yeah. We are moving and grooving moving and grooving is right in all facets of life, things are happening. Things are aligning, things are manifesting. So it's like kind of like what we talk about a lot with having the patience for your manifestations to, mm-hmm. Show themselves. Show yourself. And it's always, no matter where you are in your journey, whatever it is that you're looking forward to and what you're trying to manifest, it's always gonna require patience. Yes. But it is nice to see some of those things kind of like It's encouraging. Yeah. It's like motivation. Yeah. I'm showing up a little bit, feeling like an old lady because we were out on the towns yesterday. You guys out on the towns officially. Getting my personality back, it's feeling like summer, even though it's 62 degrees outside because baseball season started. We're here, girl. Hello? Like, I'm here. You guys don't under, I mean, I think you have somewhat of an idea, but I really don't think you guys understand how much it affects like my life. Yes. And I never thought I would be here, but as I grow older and as I am a fan of the same team for literally my whole life, I have not been a fan of any other, I take that back. I've not been this. I've not been this big of a fan of a baseball team ever. I don't know what I'm saying. Yes, I have. It's because I, it's because I did root for the Braves for like a while. Right. I celebrated the World Series win, but I'm not gonna talk about that. So being a lifelong, were you that big of a fan or was it just like, I mean, I went, I went to some of the games. You had no choice to be right? It's like, yeah. That one. You were an ally. I was an ally, a Braves ally. Being a lifelong Padres fan has come with many, many woes, and still to this day we have woes. But being a diehard fan of a team, no matter what is, that's what I'm here for. Mm-hmm. And so I love the. I just love kind of this energy that we've had around our team and I love the energy that San Diego has had around both the Padres and the new soccer team, which we are trying to get out to both men's and women's 'cause we support. And I, yeah, it's just, I don't know. The hills are alive with the sound of, with the sound of baseball bats. Yes. Cracking. Yeah. So we crack, we enjoyed a game. We had a good like. Honestly, all weekend was about the Padres. Like we had a little partee at home. Mm-hmm. And made some nachos and watched, we're all homemade nachos. They kind of slapped. They they slapped. Hoard. Yeah. They went really good. Yeah. Hit me up. Make your homemade plate of nachos. So it's been good. It's been fun. I'm trying to not spend all of my money on these men. That's really hard. But yeah, I think that, I mean. I won't speak for everyone in the city of San Diego, but I just feel like with like losing the Chargers mm-hmm. And stuff, I think everybody's just chosen to rally against the Padres because like they've been getting better and better mm-hmm. The last few seasons. And so, because there's nothing really else besides soccer, it's like, well, what else are we gonna root for in our city? So it's a nice comradery. It's comradery. Yeah. She made me, she brought me to the baseball dark side because I like. Never was that interested in. Wow. I never was that interested in it just reminds me, reminds, it just reminds me of like a flad penis or it is when it just like literally falls down when it all of a sudden doesn't wanna be hard anymore. It's like, it's like, and out of nowhere too, you're like, oh, I'm done. Yeah. Sorry. I was never that into baseball because I grew up in Wisconsin and the brewers just are not, they've never been like that. Great. I don't know, I think they've been to a World Series before, but like a very, very long time ago. Hmm. And then in Vegas, like Vegas doesn't still to this day, doesn't have a baseball team. You want who they're getting, uh, the A's. Right? Yeah. They're stealing all of Oakland's teams. Yeah. Yeah. So yeah, I just was never really that excited about baseball. I used to think it was really boring. And then I moved to Houston and the Astros won the World Series in 2019. And then right before I moved, like one of the last things I did in Houston before I moved was go to see the World Series. When they won the second time in a row. Mm-hmm. So that kinda got me excited. Honestly, if you put a hot man in front of me, there's no other way to motivate me, honestly. Like I really was not interested in baseball until my friend was like, but look at Jeremy Pena. And I'm like, you know, you what? You're right. I'll go to a game. You're absolutely right. Like, but wait. Yeah. And then living here, they were always watching baseball and I would like be in and out of it and I didn't really like. I wasn't invested and then, and then I saw Fernando and I was, was like, you know what? I'm locked in. We're here. Yeah. Not saying that, that's the only reason I do actually, now that I understand the sport, I like it a lot more. Mm-hmm. And I think that I like get more excited for it than football. I do too. Yeah. I've kind of lost my, my mojo dojo closet house with football. 'cause I've just, I'm kind, I don't, I can't like just switch teams, you know what I mean? And I, and mm. So it's like, I think I root for the LA chargers, like from afar, but I don't have any type of like, emotional connection to the team anymore. Right. And that's okay. I am totally fine with that. I, I'm saving money that way. Yeah. And I appreciate that. Yeah. I, I mean, and my team is very far away. Like I will always root for the Packers and I love them. And like, I like going to like bars. I found a San Diego bar that plays all the Packer games. So I like doing that when I have people who will watch games with me, but I'm just not, especially the last few years have just been like. I'm so tired of the chiefs and like, we don't even need to get, we don't, this turned into a whole thing, but it's just like, it's getting boring. It is based, boring. Football's getting a little bit boring for me personally, so maybe I'll have a revival with it later on, but I'm just not really feeling it. I, but yeah, we went to the game. We've been trying to be outside more. Mm-hmm. Dating people because as we always talk about the woes of dating, trying to date online, it's just. Maximum effort for minimum return and minimal as minimal can get y'all. It's a Sahara out there. Yeah. And so we were trying to go to Happy Doess, which is a bar in San Diego. And turns out they're closed for the majority of the work week and that checks out. 'cause it's a bar. So we ended up at a cute little speakeasy and we had a drink there, but like, you know, it's very like couples cozy vibes. Yeah. And it was good vibes. Yeah. But we were, we were a little bit more energetic than that. Yeah, so we liked it. So then we came back upstairs and we went to, uh, make Mexicans great again bar. And we were caught for this. Yeah, we were caught up. We got tricked. We did, because in the words of my daughter, mom, mom, it's Baile, it's Baile. And they were playing Baile Inolvidable. Did I say that right? Yeah. By Bad Bunny. And so we walked in as one does rushed in, as one would, I was like, hurry up and check my purse. I have places to be Right. They were taking you forever. I'm like, yeah, I have a clear bag. Exactly. If anything, like I had more stuff 'cause we had just come confirmed the game, but Oh, true. Yeah. She didn't, she wasn't carrying any of that. I'm like, hurry up, hurry up, scan me, whatever. Like, can you not, can you not hear this? So we walked in. It was okay. Obviously you could get a vibe check for like who's there. Yeah. And you know, we don't look our age and I understand that, but everyone else who's younger than us looks their age. Mm. And so they looked young. Yeah. And so we're kind of just like, okay, let's feel it out. We were definitely feeling music. People were dancing, some of them were doing something and wasn't dancing and it just, they were trying to dance and it was. It is the whole thing. People were very intoxicated, let's put it that way. Yeah. And I, and I would, I wish I could have blame that mo those movements on the alcohol, but I really don't think that they were that intoxicated. One girl couldn't even look me in the eyes. That's how drunk she was. The girl who couldn't. The girl who was dancing sideways. Sideways girl. Yeah. Oh, they were, she, they were, both of the girls were blasted. Okay. Yeah. The guy's not as much. Yeah. I guess I couldn't. Maybe they had been drinking before they even got there. Well, they they also came from the game. Yeah, that's true. So if you're getting two, three drinks at the game and then you come over here, who knows if you went to dinner before you had drinks there. Yeah. You know That's true. It was a good time. It was a good, yeah. People watching. But we did run into the manager and say, talk to your dj. Because we had like one Latin salsa song for every 25 shake Kick your ass songs. Which is cool if you're in that mindset and you're in that energy, but we just weren't, well it's alsa advertising for the bar. Like there's so many other bars in the gas lamp that play Shake your ass music. Yes. And I specifically wanna go to El Chingon 'cause I want something different. Yeah. And yeah, it just, and it was like. Throwbacks, but not even like the, like really good throwbacks. Mm-hmm. It's like things like, okay, why does every DJ like, have the same like 50 songs on their playlist? Mm-hmm. And it's the same, and it's been the same for the last 20 years. Like, you guys wanna talk shit on millennials, but like, we kind of created. What is now like going out music. Mm-hmm. Because every single thing that he was playing was pretty much besides some of the newer like Drake and Kendrick songs he was playing. Mm-hmm. Everything was from our era. Mm-hmm. They were playing like Ciara and like Missy Elliot and you know, like that was all from us and I didn't, I didn't mind it, but because we walked in there when they were playing a bad bunny song, I think that we just expected a Mexican Latin bar to. Well, that's what it is. Yeah, exactly. That's literally what it's marketed as. And then we attracted to the manager. He's like, oh, you should come on Thursdays playing that Latin music on Thursdays. I'm like, what are you talking about? Yeah. I'm like this. No, you play Latin music every night 'cause you're a Mexican bar. And there's just so many artists now to choose from that. Like there isn't an options I could get 10, 20 years ago when really the only options were Daddy Yankee. Yeah. Pit Bull. Mm-hmm. Shakira. But now there's so many, there's so many Latin artists now that I don't even know about them. All right. It's impossible to keep up with them all because there's just like they're popping up everywhere. Yeah. Which we love. And so if you. Don't take advantage of the fact that like that could be, that could be Gen Z's era now. I mean, we're talking about Benito having a number one album in the entire world, like that's just unprecedented. Information. Yeah. Like why aren't we tapping into that a little more? Right. We could go on and on, but we can go on and on. Goes on and on. Yeah. That's one of the songs. But like why is that still on a playlist? I get it. It's a classic, but it's like, yeah, that, I mean, we've heard it a thousand times over because we've been out. We've been going out for many, many years. Yeah. But I think, I mean, think about it. Think about the music being made now. It's not like shake your ass in the club music. Mm-hmm. Like the pop stars now, and even just like rap now. They're just not making those type of hits. Not as much as it was when was like when we were younger, that's all that it was. It was all music intended to be played at the club or at parties or what have you. But now it's like, and I love all these people, but like now we have like. Bill Eilish. Mm-hmm. And Sabrina Carpenter and Chapel, which Chapel? Rone, if you go to the gay bars, she's played all the time. But you know, it's just the music now is just not, and the weekend, like they can't play the weekend at the club. No. I mean, they could, but like, that's not gonna, that's just not it. Yeah. It was like, I, that's one thing that I hate about like going out culture is like, you're always waiting for the DJ to play your song. Mm-hmm. And it could be hours, hours before they play your song. Yeah. And we had to go home, you guys, like it was a drive and we just couldn't wait there any longer for it to be the same situation until two o'clock in the morning. But yeah, it was nonetheless still a very fun time. An experience. Yeah, always an experience. Always a pod plot. And if anything, I'm gonna go and I'm gonna enjoy watching people function, how they function in their daily lives and make choices. Yeah, I suppose it's kind of what's. Both of our cups 'cause it's so fresh and it's something we just did. Yeah. And as far as what I'm drinking on it's water, because Crystina texted me this morning, she's like, girl, I'm dehydrated in all the caps. Yeah. And I felt the same way. I woke up feeling like I screamed all night. Well we kinda did. Yeah. It was very loud in there. Yeah. We screamed at the game. We screamed at the club. Mm-hmm. At the club. You guys on a Monday night. Look at us, look at us. I know you guys. That's. But in this club, one of those things, we were not all fam. We were not all fam in this club. That is our story. Always gonna, we're sticking to it. Yeah. Always gonna give you guys the fun. The fun facts. We're trying. You guys, I do wanna put it out on the red. It's like, okay, if you're above the age of 28, like where are you going out? Mm-hmm. Because we're trying to find you. I gotta find you. Yes, we are trying to find you. That's in our cup. That's our intro. And now let's get into the very fun and exciting in-person interview with Han Huante. We'll see on the other side.

empaths-anon_1_03-20-2025_162730 16:59

We're sitting down with our friend Hannah Huante. She is the creator behind How Han Sees It and the host of How I See It. Pod, welcome to the podcast Hannah. Thank you for having me. I'm so excited that we get to do it in person too. I know it just kind of worked out. The stars aligned. I love that we're in your hood. I know, I know. And I didn't even have to drive that far because made it easy for me. Right in your neck of the woods. Yeah. Yeah. So normally we ask what we're drinking, but we don't have drinks today, but. How, what's in your cup? As in like, how are you showing up today? I was like, I've had so much coffee today. So it's probably a good thing. Yeah. That we don't have anything. I think it's about to be cocktail hour, honestly, so it's fine. Yeah. I'm excited. But honestly, I'm like, I feel like life is good. Like, it's weird. I feel like I'm at a place where I'm getting better at like learning to like sit in the, like the feelings of like, there can be like. Not perfect things going on and great things going on and exciting things going on all at the same time. And I can like, like I have it in me to like feel all of it. Right. And it doesn't mean that like things are bad when like I have a bad day or like that things are like always amazing when I have like a high moment. It's like interesting to find like that middle ground. Totally. Yeah. There can be room for both. Yeah. I think that's just like proof. Of the journey as well because I used to be like, like you were saying, if one little thing would go wrong, yeah. Everything is shit. Or like even you guys came to the pod anniversary dinner. Mm-hmm. And that was such like a high moment. And I, that week was so stressful and there was like so many emotional things going on in the background as well. Just 'cause like life was lifeing. Yeah. And I was like having this moment where I was like, I am so happy right now. Like I am having such a high, how could I be like so upset in the background about something else? And sometimes I just have to like remind myself that it's like not that deep and that like you can have like high elevated moments and celebrate those moments. And also the next day have a moment where you're like, I'm really fucking sad about this. Or like, this business thing didn't go through. So I'm bummed about that and like have room for it all. Right. Yeah. And finally having that capacity feels really good. Yeah. Yeah. And just like learning that, I think reminding yourself that like the human experiences, the human experience is about like. Ups and downs, and I think sometimes we get caught up in like the low or the high. Right. And we get too attached to both. Yeah. And like it's okay to just like try to find somewhere in the middle and like let all of the emotions kind of sit with you at the same time, depending on what's happening, right? Yeah. When I first started my spiritual journey. I felt like I had to be at a hundred all the time. And when I had days where I did feel depressed again or anxious, I'm like, well, I'm doing something wrong. Totally. Like, let do a sound bath. Let me do this, let me do that to get back to that high feeling. And I'm like, you know what? It's always chasing highs then. And then is that really genuine? Yeah. Or like we're always trying to like do something. Mm-hmm. And I almost. Sometimes feel like, and don't get me wrong, like I love doing all the things. Like I love listening to the podcast, doing the workout, going on the walk. Yeah. Doing the affirmations. Like it's all amazing. Like that's really a part of like doing the work. But I think sometimes it can be such a, like a cop out to not sit in our feelings. Mm-hmm. And like we distract by doing more and more and more. And sometimes like you have to kind of like sit in it and like. I feel like we've, we've become really spoiled in the sense of like, we're not supposed to be like, feeling bad. Like there's this false narrative around like healing. Yeah. Where like, I'm not supposed to feel bad. Mm-hmm. I've done this work. I've already chosen to heal. Yeah. I've already chosen to heal. And it's like, no, this is, this is life. This is the human experience. Like you have to be able to sit with negative emotion too. And that's okay. Yeah. Yeah. It's like finding the neutrality of being in that middle space is like emotional and intellectual maturity. Like the more that you grow with it, the more it becomes, right. Comfortable, as you always say, being uncomfortable. And we just love that we can have open-ended conversations about the reality of it all. Yeah. Like every day is not gonna look the same. Every moment's not gonna look the same. I could be pissed off one hour and then the next thing I've, I've calmed down because. I, I have allowed myself to feel that. Mm-hmm. Like we had to rush down here today. And the car ride was a, was a fun one because we just needed to kind of like yell a couple of expletives and. And we let it out and we let the energy out of our bodies and then we made a decision that it was like, it's okay. It is what it is, and everything will flow for the rest of the day. Yeah. Well, I think we've gotten, people still seem to think that like doing the work is like not hard, right? Like we call it the work for a reason. It's not a cliche, like it's, it's legitimately really fucking hard and like one of the hardest. Things as like being like about being human is that we like have to surrender and like people just don't like to surrender. Of course. Like it's really scary and painful to not know what's gonna happen. So I think instead of being able to sit in the uncomfortable, we try to like do all the things or like not feel the high or not feel the low and like. It's just, I, I am trying to work on like, especially me being so, like, I love that your guys' podcast is like, about being empath, like being so empathetic and highly sensitive, but also just being so existential. I'm like very existential and I'm trying to get better at just being like, it's not that deep. Like just, just go forward. Like, you're, you're doing great. Yeah. Like, keep going. You don't have to think this hard about what's happening. I spend too much time thinking yes. For us it's really hard to not always. Why I'm like, what's the deeper meaning behind that? Like what does that mean? I know like sometimes it doesn't mean anything or like it's okay. Yeah, as she's saying that, I'm like, it's probably 'cause you're a Pisces. You know what I mean? Like 12th House. I know. I know nothing about my horoscope. Like really? I mean, I know what I am. I'm right. I'm a Pisces and then my like other two are both Leo. Ooh. Okay. That makes sense. I totally thought that you were a Leo. So then when I saw it was your birthday, I'm like, oh no, she's a, she's a piy. Yeah. Isn't it like, seriously, I'm so dumb when it comes to like horoscope stuff, but I'm told you're fine. You're that like your other two, like the rising in the sun are like what you present as, but like your actual is like who you are inside. So I feel like that makes sense. Like I present very like confident and like alpha, but inside I'm very like emotional. She's, because you're Pisces. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Your rising especially is like who people, people's impression of you, like what they see you as. Totally. And then your moon is usually like how you feel inside and then your son is like your personality. Okay. Is my son my Pisces? Yeah. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. I see, I see. I just learned something here. Yeah.

Danie 23:25

We're always talking about in the pod, like we don't go an episode without mentioning one something thing because the astrology is always going to astrologers. Yeah. But we, uh, before we came down here, posted that we were going to have a fun conversation with you and we had a couple people Yes. Come in and add, ask, ask questions. Questions. Okay. Yay. We love so much. I'm nervous communication. Oh, no, they're, they're good. They're good questions. Okay, cool. One of 'em is a more fun one, so we'll say that to the end. But kind of just speaking to, uh, your openness with mental health struggles, depression and anxiety, and acknowledging those things. That are with you, but that they aren't completely you and they're not your personality. Mm-hmm. We had a question come in and they asked, what did you, or do you use as reminders to keep going when you did or do have depressive episodes?

empaths-anon_1_03-20-2025_162730 24:17

Oh my God. Yeah. They went really deep. Yeah. No, I love it. Yeah. I talk a lot on the podcast about like the process of like removing depression and anxiety from my identity. Hmm. Because I think a lot of times if you struggle with depression or anxiety. Or you've come out like on the other side of it, especially if you've come out on like kind of the other side of the major part of working through that stuff that like keeps you kind of like crippled. You can kind of look back and be like, wow, I was. Keeping myself in a place of victimhood or I was perpetuating my own misery. And I think people who are in the thick of it really don't like to hear that. Like it's very triggering to hear the word victim. Right. And I'm not saying that like people's feelings aren't valid, their experiences aren't valid. That their childhood, whatever they went through to lead them to a place, you know, that I really was for a very long time isn't valid. I'm more saying that like most of us are adults now and we have control of our life and what we. Have to do with it. Mm-hmm. It may have not started with us, but it's with us now. And so I think like when I talk about like removing it from my identity, like it's definitely like still apart. It's there, but I've, they've become like dormant, almost like almost just passengers in the car that I've chosen not to like give the steering wheel. Yeah. And so now I think when I used to be in a place where when some anxiety would pop up or like spurts of like depression would pop up, I would almost start to like spiral on the fact that it was like coming up. Like I would be like, oh my God. It's coming back. It's coming back. Mm-hmm. And we've talked about this too, like when you've experienced such like deep depression or suicidal thoughts, it's really scary to even like feel it a little. Right. But I've gotten good at just acknowledging first that like it's actually a part of the human experience to be anxious. It's a part of the human experience to like be depressed sometimes. Like it's actually not that deep sometimes, right? Like I can like feel it for a second and be like. Okay. I don't have to spiral that like I'm regressing in my healing journey like this is happening in my life that is anxiety inducing. Yeah. This is a normal human experience and I need to keep pushing forward anyway. Right. And I think that like you can look back and remind yourself in those moments of like, what have I overcome? How far I've come, I can look back at moments that I was anxious, like the year prior thinking like, what am I gonna do? And then I've like moved so far past it. Now it's like the least of my worries and I'm like, oh my God, I thought that was the end of the world. I mean, it doesn't make it easy, right? But I think that, you know, reminding myself of the things that I've like been through and overcome. Keeps it at bay a bit. Okay. Because you're like showing yourself evidence that like you've gone through it, but it's hard. Yeah. It's really, really hard. It is, yeah. But I think that even recognizing it is showing that you are further along in your journey. Yeah, because I've had those moments too, where I. I like how you say they're passengers in your car because, I mean, I have OCD in my car. I have depression in my car, and I think that it, I think the fear of it creeping back is always valid because I lost so many years of my twenties being depressed. Totally. There's just a lot of times I don't even remember. But I get a afraid of that because I'm like, how severe is this about to be? You know what I mean? Yeah. Is it a day? Yeah. Is it just a passing feeling right now? Yeah. Or am I getting sucked back in because for a while it felt like that. Yeah. But I think what I remind myself, I. Of is even having these check-in moments with myself is showing that I'm growing because the me five years ago didn't know how to do that. Yeah. And I think also those sometimes, like when you're having those moments, it can feel like you're really out of control, which perpetuates like the anxiety of it all in general, or the guilt or the shame around those things coming back in. And I think I've, I'm trying to get better and I've been doing it. Doing better at it recently, reminding myself that like, when I don't feel in control of myself or others, like choosing to surrender or choosing to remind myself that I can like push forward actually is a form of control. Like I do have a choice in that. Mm-hmm. And, and like reminding myself that I'm capable of that. Has been like really helpful as well. Also, like creating a toolbox for yourself. I feel like if you, if you don't have a toolbox, like you've gotta create a toolbox. So like, it's like a few things that, you know, like ground you or like get you in a good mood or get you feeling good. Like for me, like what I'm talking about now, like I'm, I will physically like write, start writing out a list of like things I've overcome over the last few years that I thought. Or like the end of the world. Right. And that like reminder and validation kind of gives me this like, okay, yeah, this isn't that extra push. You know, I'm fine. The affirmations were huge for me in my own healing. And it's so cliche, but like, it's not like I actually in my head, like I can hear my voice to myself. Mm-hmm. Like saying affirmations all the time when like a negative thought pops in. It helps a lot. I think, like for me and a lot of people. I feel like act like talking to others is like a form of weakness. Like, not for me. Like I love calling my best friends and being like, Hey, like I'm not feeling good right now. Like, can I just talk to you about how I'm feeling or just like catch up with you because I know that like the people around me make me feel good. Like there has to be like activities and things in the toolbox to like get you out. Mm-hmm. Of those spirals. I was gonna say tool bagg. You took the words right outta my mouth. Yeah. Like a Mary Poppins bag. Oh, I love that. For you, like there it's personalized tools. So if it's calling your best friend, if it's calling mom any other family member, someone who you know is an active listener mm-hmm. And not gonna just kind of spout off advice that you didn't ask for or preface that with a person saying, Hey, I just need you to be this for me right now if you have the capacity. Which I've kind of tried to normalize in my relationships as well instead of. Calling someone outta the blue and just like word vomiting, I ask them first. I'm like, Hey, I really need to speak with you Totally. Can we meet? Or hey, like, do you have the time for this? Especially, 'cause my circle looks a little different now with a couple of my friends being moms. Mm-hmm. So I do know what that's like. I know what the schedule is like, and a lot of the times, like at the end of the day, I just wanna hit the pillow. Yeah. And I can't talk anymore. I have talked to my toddler all day. Yeah. And I listener all day. So I, I definitely get that. I love the, the tool bag aspect of it. Yeah, no, for sure. And I think sometimes it can feel in these moments that like, it's like dark. I, I, I don't mean to make it sound like it's not like it's this easy thing. No, it's definitely not easy. But I think that, I say remove the charge as a way because people who struggle with what we're talking about, it is really deep and it is really hard. And I do think there's. There's something about like reminding yourself though, that like, it doesn't have to be like, I have a choice right now to kind of view this passenger in the car that's trying to lure me back to this dark place as like a child where I'm like, no, you don't not have control over me. Yeah. And like, I'm gonna remove the charge from this. Like I'm feeling anxious. Like this happened to me the other day. Like I started feeling like really anxious for no reason. It hasn't happened to me in a really long time where it just like came from nothing. 'cause I feel like I'm really good at. Now like mastering my mind, I'll say in the sense of like when anxiety pops up mentally I'm really good at like putting it down, right? Just after years of practice now. But it was like body, like body anxiety. Oh, that's, yeah, that's right. It's the worst. Mm-hmm. And you're like, where the fuck is this coming from? Like, I'm not even spiraling in my head, right? Like, I'm just like, and I think it's just, I've been so busy lately. There's so much like built up like antsiness that I could like. Anxiety just like filled my body and I started to panic. Like a little not gonna lie, because when it comes to like mental anxiety, I'm like, I got this right. Yeah, you're, but then when this popped up, I was like, fuck. But again, I just took a deep breath, like grabbed a tea and I was just like, no, like you don't have to do this. Like, how can I like work off? I went into like problem solving mode, like how can I work off this antsy, anxious energy? Yeah. Okay. I'm gonna clean, I'm gonna go outside and walk, right? I'm gonna go like. Get like some step in steps in like try to get this off. Like I go into problem solving mode instead of panic mode. Yeah. And I think that helps a lot. Yeah, that's a good tip too. I think to your point, I think that what we're talking about can be triggering to people and I don't want anyone listening to feel like we haven't been there. 'cause I, we all have in some way this, it's still hard sometimes and it's still hard sometimes. But I wanna encourage people that. What we're saying is out of love, and we all will arrive at this place during our journey when we do accept, you know, like, you know what, that was a little bit of victimhood. You know what? Yeah. Like, I do have a part in this. I think that's the hardest part. Oh, it's painful. I was, so the first time that I went to therapy with a new therapist, I've been going to one for a while. It just wasn't, I didn't really feel like I was getting anywhere. Yeah. So I went to a new therapist and it was the perfect. It was almost like a motherly figure that was like, she had all of the wisdom, but she almost gave me a little bit of tough love because it's like there were just things that I was talking in circles and I wasn't being real with myself. And she was like, you know what? We really need to work on, you know, getting out of the victim mindset. And I literally left that therapy session. So pissed off. Oh yeah. Because I'm like, how dare she? Like, does she not know all the things I've been through? And I'm like, oh, okay. I get what she's saying. Yeah. You're like, oh, I think I'm doing it right now. No, I mean, I see it with love. Yeah. But like, I wish more people would've said this right when I was going through it. Exactly. Like, I don't care if you're angry listening to this. Like, I'm sorry, I'm like doing it for your sake. Like, I don't know you, but like I wish more people, I wish I would've heard this more. Like I wish someone would've like. Came to me and been like, you're perpetuating your own misery. I would've been pissed and I probably wouldn't have talked to them. Yeah. But I wish more people would've tried because Yeah, like when I got to therapy, I was at a point where, oh my God, I was just so down bad. Like I couldn't get much worse. And so then I like remember like very clearly being at a place where I couldn't deny like. My part in like why my life was so disastrous, right? Like, yeah. Again, didn't start with me. Like there were so many things that happened in my childhood, like experiences my family, like literally like a whole bucket of bullshit that I could have blamed and I was blaming for so long. But you know, you look at the signs like every single friend of mine had like left me. Mm-hmm. I had like painted that picture as like, uh, everyone is bad, right? But like, what's the common thread between all these people? It was me. And so like there comes a point where you either can choose to live in denial or you can be unapologetically real with yourself. Look in the mirror, which is really fucking painful, and be like. I'm perpetuating my own misery. What can I do to like move myself out? And the moment I did that, and it wasn't quick, it was years, right? I look at it myself now and I'm like, holy shit. Like I've, I've moved 360. I don't claim things like depression and anxiety anymore. And I'm like. Living the best life that I can like right now. And that definitely doesn't mean it's perfect. It definitely, definitely doesn't mean I'm not struggling in different ways. But yeah, definitely living a life that I didn't think was possible for myself. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Being real is sometimes like. The love that you really need. Yeah. Because no one else is gonna do it for you. I think it's the biggest act of self-love too. Yes. Yeah. Like looking in the mirror, it's one of the most painful acts of love that we can like do, do, but like it is like the biggest act of self love, I think. Yeah. Yeah. I would love to know, like going back, I know, I mean, whatever you feel comfortable with sharing on here is totally up to you. Mm-hmm. But I guess. You now just live so un unapologetically and it's part of your brand. It's one of the reasons too, like why I gravitated towards you. 'cause I'm like, thank you. There's just not enough people talking about that and especially in an age where everything is so rose colored glasses, totally on social media. It was just so refreshing. I love to hear your journey towards that and kind of what made you decide that this was gonna be the legacy that you wanted to lead with your community? Yeah. No. Yeah. I think like unapologetic, like being unapologetic is like about fully aligning with our authentic self. And I think like you can hear the word unapologetic and like hear, like, think it means like bing, like. Almost like disrespectful or harsh. Like I don't mean it that way. Right. I think being like truly our unapologetic selves is about like fully aligning with our true authenticity. And a lot of times we're not aligned in our true authenticity, which is what makes us sick. Like through depression, anxiety, whatever. Like I think that there can be things that happen in your childhood that you're not even responsible for that don't allow us to be like aligned in our authenticity. 'cause you're so confused. Mm-hmm. Like for me, like I grew up in a very chaotic home like. Emotionally. Okay. And I think that a lot of the like stuff that was happening communication wise, uh. Was like violating my conscience. Mm. Like a lot of the stuff happening in my house was, I knew I felt like on a deep level, like not right, but like it was all I knew. And so there was this confusing back and forth that caused a lot of dis-ease. I'll say. That's like what my therapist like called it like, it's like violating our conscience almost. So it causes like dis-ease. Yeah. And like makes us sick. Like through depression, anxiety, because we're not aligning with like our true authenticity, which for me was to like be communicative in a healthy way or like have peace or like, I don't know, just like I knew what was right and like the things that were happening in my house. I knew were wrong and chaotic and crazy. So I think like it just perpetuated over time, obviously through different experiences and traumas as well as you get older. And then I start to like latch on to the way my parents and family and our dynamics of communication, I start like taking those and like using them in my own life and I'm causing more chaos. And then that's violating my authenticity. And then I'm wondering like, why am I so sick? Like why am I so chaotic? And it's. You know, it's just like this huge cycle. So I think for me, it, it got to a point where I was just like so anxious, so depressed. I was like so chaotic. Like, so like, I'm trying, just like having flashbacks of me. Like I was, I was so confrontational. I was just like so unhealthy, like wounded. Yeah, I was so, I had no self-worth. I had no self-love. I was just a mess. So it got so bad and I think I was just like, I was very suicidal. I was, yeah. It was just a mess. And so I think like it got to a point where I did have, though I feel this like deep knowing that like I wasn't meant for like this, like I, I honestly for being like real, like I think that's what kept me from like. You know, listening to the suicidal thoughts, like I knew it wasn't right, and I knew I shouldn't have been feeling that way, and I knew that like I was meant for more. I had this like deep knowing, I think, and I've always been like very in tune. Mm-hmm. But I think I had to like quiet the voice for so long that it was making me sick. So I got to a point kind of in college. I was dating this guy and we broke up. And I think, like, it's so funny. I look back at like, it was so devastating to me. It, I like it totally triggered like my suicidal thoughts. I got like, I had like a total mental episode. But I think it wasn't so much him. I think it was that I had attached like my sanity and peace to the relationship because I hadn't like. Healed. Mm-hmm. So like, it was like a good distraction. And then when it was gone, I like was back. Right. You like, oh, he's making me better at my best self in this relationship. Yeah. And I really wasn't no girl. No, I really wasn't my best self either. I think it was just like something to do. Like it kept my mind occupied. 'cause I was like trying to fix him. I was trying to like be in the relationship. So when it was gone I had to like, sit with myself again and then it was too painful. But I think at that point I was like ready to like face myself. Like I felt like. It was time and honestly like, for lack of a better word, I just like, it couldn't get much worse like I wanted to die. So like either like go to therapy and it doesn't work and I am where I am or like, you know, not to be morbid, but it was bad. So then, so then I went and I think I was just really open and I think I like got to like be heard for the first time. And I think subconsciously I called how hand sees it. How hand sees it, because I was never able to just say how I saw it. Like I was never able to just like call things out. I never felt like I could be like my authentic self. I felt like my emotions were too much. And so how hand sees it kind of stemmed from this idea to, you know, unapologetically show like my, not just my fashion, but my lifestyle and my ideas and like what I thought about certain things and I wanted to unapologetically talk about the mental health struggle. Like I was going through. So I kinda like started that in the midst of all of this and started going to therapy and that's when I like, thank God for my therapist. But 'cause she was like very much like a mother figure, like me, like yours too. But she like taught me about like violating your conscience and like I got to learn about like the way, like the things that happened in my childhood impacted me, right? And then once I learned those things, I think I was like empowered to actually put them into. Action. Like I saw the devastation that it was causing in my life, and I was empowered to like. Make different choices and master my mind in certain ways. And question like the thoughts I had and like, you know, this, we can get into the nitty gritties of all this, right? But like, I just think it was this, this dedication I had to like be unapologetic. Like finally just like be authentic, like live authentically and like be unapologetic about who I am and the things I wanna do and the things that I know I should be doing as well. Yeah, yeah. I relate to that a lot. In a similar family situation where I just felt like I know in here and in here, like what should be happening. Yeah. And what does feel aligned and like how a family unit should function. Totally. But yet everybody else is telling me that like all of this dysfunction is normal. Totally. So I totally get that. I was like, you just grew up feeling so voiceless that when you realize that. Life isn't just happening to you, and you can make choices and you can have a voice. You're like, oh, it's fucking on. Yeah, yeah. Well, and it's like a honeymoon, right? Mm-hmm. Like I had this honeymoon phase of like the whole unapologetic movement, I'll call it, within myself, where I was like, this is amazing. Like, I've never felt like so good, you know? Because you're like being heard and you're talking things out, and you're like having all these release patterns and you're like, yes. Like, you know, and you're aligning in it and you start to heal. But I think the real work starts in like. Moving past intellectualization and actually like putting it into action. And that's when things get really fucking hard. And I think like to your point, like it can feel like I, I think it gets really confusing and I talked about it in like my season finale of season two, but like you can feel on a deep level that like you're violating your conscience, that there are these desires and dreams you have for yourself that are not coming into fruition. But then when you try to make those decisions or you try to make that like. Communication change or you try to like get into the healthy relationship or you try to go for the business or you try to like not pop off at someone. Like it feels like it's violating you in some way. Yeah. Even though you know it's not aligned with your authentic self, so you get really confused 'cause you're like, oh, this feels incredibly uncomfortable. This feels like not what I'm supposed to do. This can't be. What I'm supposed to do. It can't be this uncomfortable, right? But then you're perpetuating the same decisions and choices in your life and then you're like, what the fuck? Right? This seems so frustrating and hopeless and I think the hardest part of healing and like being your unapologetic self is actually making the choices that feel foreign though, you know, they're aligned with your authentic desires. It's like doing the hard thing now for your future self. And then I think the more times you do it. You can look and be like, okay, this feels incredibly uncomfortable right now, but like I did this last time. And like, look what happened. And now I'm happy. So I need to do the thing that feels like I'm not supposed to do it, but I know I'm supposed to do it. Yeah. And then the more times you do it, you're like, you're providing evidence for yourself. Yeah. So that you can like, kind of like get more comfortable making the uncomfortable choice, but it's fucking hard being your most unapologetic self. It's really, really hard. It is. 'cause you have to retrain. Yeah. Mm-hmm. Oh my God. We've experienced this so much in. Dating here recently. Oh yeah. Where it's like, oh my God. I am like in this place where I'm, uh, faced with a decision that I need to make and I know the right one, but I'm just like, blah, I can't make that choice. But I know that I have to. It's so hard. Yeah, it's incredibly hard. I actually had to do this recently, like, because I feel like I've always been the person that, I mean being like an empath, one being the fixer, two, being the oldest daughter. Three, up being someone who like, like literally who just like wants to fix everything so that you don't have to like, lose control. Yeah. Like being the person that like has to fight for love. Mm-hmm. Always. Mm-hmm. Like, it's like painful and uncomfortable to get out of that place. Because if you've been there your entire life, like it doesn't feel natural to like give up, quote unquote on people. Yeah. And so recently I kind of had to do this with someone like really close to me that I had like a really deep connection with. Like, I had to be like, I can't do this anymore to myself, even though I know I could. Like, I could, I want to, yeah. I want to keep like getting less than I deserve and like I want to keep, like that's my natural state. Yeah. Right. But if I, my truest authentic self. Wants to get married. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Wants to be in a healthy relationship. Then I need to do the uncomfortable thing that feels like the thing I'm not normal with. Yeah. Which is leave and cut this off. Yeah. Even though I wanna stay so that my future self is like, oh shit, I'm so happy I did that. Yeah. It's confusing though. It's confusing to even articulate. Yeah. 'cause it feels like you're starting back at ground zero. You're like. Why I feel like I'm taking a step back, but instead you are clearing the path for yourself to find somebody who's way more Yeah. Aligned with what you want. Or not even a step back though, it just feels like horrible. Yeah. Like it feels like so incredibly uncomfortable. Yeah. It's like I'm used to this, like I want this, like I just want this to work out so that I don't have to go find something else, or I don't have to surrender to the unknown. Back to surrender. Mm-hmm. Like we don't wanna surrender. Yeah, especially for people who have like been in the place where they have to like be the fixer and deal with bullshit or like deal with mistreatment. Like you're so used to dealing with that, that you're like I think I'm just gonna stay here. It's like less painful. Right? And it's the same thing with depression and anxiety. Like it's, I think there's this narrative, and again, not to be like, you're like not a victim, but

Han Huante 46:59

there's this victim mentality, or I'll say validation mentality. And I really struggled with this where I almost felt like if I let go. Or like of someone or something, or some event. Like if I let go and move on, then like who's gonna validate it? Like who's gonna validate that it happened? Yeah. Or like if I let go of this relationship, like who's gonna fix this person? Or if I let go of the thing that's keeping me super depressed and anxious.

empaths-anon_1_03-20-2025_162730 47:27

Like,

Han Huante 47:28

who's gonna say that? Like, I, I worked hard and that I, I deserve to be angry. And I think it just comes to a point where it's just like, who are you doing this for?

empaths-anon_1_03-20-2025_162730 47:37

Right. Yeah. Like, there's this, I had someone on the podcast recently, I don't know if you guys have watched the show, the Bear Love? Absolutely. Okay. I haven't. I haven't. But she was talking about this scene and it really resonated with me where I guess he's just like talking about all this stuff and then he's talking about like waiting for the other shoe to drop. Yeah. And she looks at him and just goes, who's counting shoes? And I think it's that feeling of like, we're holding on so tightly to people or experiences or things that are keeping us in a perpetuation of misery cycle. Mm-hmm. And then we're like, I don't know, it's like, who is, who is keeping track of this? Like who are you trying to prove something to? Yeah. Like no one cares. Right. Always being hypervigilant and preparing for the worst. And it's like, well girl. Who's to say the worst is gonna happen? We're just being like, no. Like if I like, like stop being angry, or if I like let go of this like depression and anxiety, then like, who's gonna validate that I had a horrible childhood? Who's gonna validate that my parents were mean to me? Like, who's gonna validate like no one? I am not trying to be a bitch, but like no one cares. Like we're not in a movie where like, it's true. I say it all the time, like you are the only person in control of your life. Yeah, completely. And if it's good or bad. Mm-hmm. We all can't control our circumstances, right. We all are given either a short, like people are given shorter sticks, but at the end of the day, like you are the only person that can move you forward. Not anyone else. Yeah. And so why are we concerned with like. Validation. Right? Or validating our like childhood realities or our current realities or who's watching. If we like fix, like leave people behind and like don't fix them. Like just because you're highly sensitive, empathetic, right? Like trauma kid like mm-hmm. That doesn't give you an excuse to just. Like go fix everyone. Be everyone's therapist or pout, honestly. Yeah. Yeah. And a lot of the time, it's like when you are that person, you're focused so much on everyone around you that the more and more that you pour yourself into other people, you're becoming depleted as an individual and you're becoming depleted as your personality starts to dwindle. Because a lot of the time people are attracted people who. Don't have that and don't have the ability to like share their light with others. They just steal it from other people. Totally. They're attracted to people like us who are highly sensitive. And Right. You have to learn to harness it. Yeah. That's the part where we say it's like there are some choices. It doesn't have to be this grandiose act of like, I'm, I'm climbing the, I don't know, the stairs in Rocky and I'm like telling everybody I'm done. Oh, yeah. No, it's really small daily choices I think that we're talking about here, like. I don't know the timelines and how they're gonna add up, but you guys should go listen to us on Han's Pod 'cause we're doing a fun little swap where we talk about I had a moment where I looked in the mirror and I didn't know who I was looking at anymore, and I mm-hmm. Had to make a choice. So it's like. Those are the things that we're talking about. Yeah. Right. Obviously there are things in our lives that are going to happen to us that we're like, okay, wasn't expecting that. Right. But how long do you stay in the thing you didn't expect? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I say it all the time, actually. 'cause I think what I'm saying can sound harsh, but it's just the truth like. I've tried as someone who's very highly empathetic and invest way too emotionally invested in everyone around me and trying to control everyone and fix everyone and make sure like everyone's moving forward. I'm trying to get better and I feel like I've, like finally am doing a better job of like. Having empathy, like continuing to have empathy, but not having sympathy. Like there's like a boundary and me and my best friends say it all the time. Like I have empathy, but I don't have sympathy. And it like, it comes to a point where you have to like, you can still have empathy, but you can't have sympathy anymore. And if that means like moving forward, especially in relationships. Yeah. Like you kind of have to, you kind of have to do that, you know? Yeah. Gotta put boundaries up, which is hard for yourself. Totally. Yeah. Because it's like the sympathy doesn't really. Help the person. No, it doesn't help you. It doesn't help the person. And to your point, like at what point are you just like depleted and anxious and upset because you're letting everyone's choices around you like affect you too much or the past affect you too much? So I, I think I'm really trying to, that's like been like the biggest part of my healing journey and kind of like getting and becoming my fully unapologetic self. And it's still a work in progress. I'm not perfect. I mess up all the time. But I don't consider mastering perfection. I just, I consider it like living your life a way you want to and that you're proud of, right? Mm-hmm. Yeah. I think to your point and just round out. This portion so nicely. I think that when you take the mirror, like looking in the mirror moment and you are real with yourself and you give yourself that tough love, I think that's like when it clicks, at least for me, like that's when it clicked. When I could just sit here and be like, you know what, Christina, you did that and it was really shitty, or you're. Perpetuating your own misery and this is how, yeah, this is why all these friends are walking outta your life or fill in the blank of whatever it is. It's like, is the depression painful? Is the anxiety overwhelming? Sometimes, yes. I don't wanna say that those things are not valid, but I think that what we're all trying to express is that once you have that moment with yourself and you check in, that's when you can. move forward. And that's where you start to find like the freedom and the like, I can take a breath and this isn't my identity and it's not the end of the world, and like, I'm going to be okay. Yeah. I mean, I caught myself a lot of times. Like I look back in hindsight and I like look back at these moments like where I was like in these chaotic situations that were like probably my fault. And I like look back and I remember like the root of that, like anger and sadness and frustration, like being like, but I had to go through this type of vibe. And like now, I mean in when I face the mirror, it's like kind of like my parents aren't here. Like I am not a child in a house anymore. Again, to our point, like you're perpetuating your own misery, you're perpetuating your own situation. There is no one here that is like doing this stuff anymore. Yeah, yeah. It's like it's mine now. Mm-hmm. So I think that's what it is. It's that being your unapologetic self is about like taking control of your life. Looking in the mirror like that is like moving into your most unapologetic self. Totally. Yes. Yeah. Okay. Well we love it so much. We can continue having this conversation forever. Forever over, over and over again. 'cause there's so much to always say. We did wanna end on a little bit of a. Fun question. Oh yeah, let's lighten things up. Yeah. I have to do this in my life where I'll meet with random, no, I'll like meet with random people and then I'm like talking about childhood shit gets so fucking deep. The suicide thing always pops up for me. Even at my dinner. Yeah. I was like giving my toast and I was like, everyone's filming me. I shouldn't use the S word. I'll say like, really bad place. Like I just get so too deep sometimes and so unapologetic and then I'm like, okay. How can I light things up? Yeah. Right now. Now we'll do something fun. That's, but that's my personality. Yeah. My bio, my TikTok bio was overshare and recovery. Oh, I love that. Yeah. I literally am oversharing every single moment of my life. But the fun question we got from one of our dear, dear friends and listeners is. A fun fashion question, so she asked. Oh. Mm-hmm. What are your tips and or alternatives to fast fashion? Mm-hmm. And sustainable brands that don't use plastic as like the biggest, oh my God. I don't know if I'm like even qualified to answer this question, but I'm gonna give my honest first reaction. Yeah. So I love, I'm a big vintage shopper, like I love Designer vintage. Mm-hmm. Designer is not. Like it's so expensive and it's not available or attainable for everyone. But I will say like a coat at Zara is like $200. And these Gucci meals that I'm wearing right now, were also $200 from the RealReal. Right? And so I love the RealReal because it's like designer stuff that has. Has like been pre loved. Mm-hmm. And it's, you know, it's, it's not cheap. It's nice quality stuff, but it's gonna last forever. And it's the same price as like a fast fashion coat or shoe from Zara. Yeah. But it's like from a place that, you know, sells and resells. Mm-hmm. Like designer items. So I'm a big. Real, real gal. You just have to like filter low to high, like check the brands you like right? And just scout for a couple hours and you'll find like amazing things. I love the men's goodwill section for Blazers. Yes. Best blazers ever. I'm actually not wearing one today from Goodwill, but like half of my collections from the men's Goodwill section. Mm-hmm. They have like amazing shoulder pad structured blazers. I'm trying to think of like another. Not fast fashion brand that I really, really like. I love the Frankie shop. They're not super affordable, but their pieces last forever, so if you like buy one blazer from them, it'll last forever. So like investing in Yeah, but I'm investor for sure. I don't buy trend items. Mm-hmm. Like at all. Unless I really think they're gonna last forever. Like I just think it's not worth it. Yeah. And then I think like you have to pick like really pick pieces that are gonna stay in your like capsule wardrobe. So like a really nice pair of denim, like a really good black trouser. I think a white, crisp white t-shirt, a block blazer, and then a nice block. Pump. Yeah. Like that's the staples. And you can sustainably source those. And if you can do it, no way to go. Yeah. Let me know. We're so tired. Yeah. We're so tired of fast fashion. It's like AOS here and the, yeah. I can't do its there. And then where does it all end up? Back at the freaking Goodwill. We saw so many Forever 21 shirts when we were thrifting the other day. Yeah. I can't do that. Right. Or just like what? Like why would I buy it here at Goodwill when I can get it at for over 21 for the same price? Well, and like I would challenge people who like shop. Like Zara and all of that. And you know, I don't judge, like I'm not right the best at sustainable practice. We're not perfect, but I will say, like, I would challenge people to look at like how much money they've spent at Zara over a year time. Mm-hmm. And then like, look at the number. And that's true when you're like telling me like, yeah, but I don't wanna spend on expensive stuff like on the RealReal or at Frankie shop or whatever. But it's like. Look at the total you've spent on fast fashion and it's probably all ended up like shrunken in a dryer and at Buffalo Exchange. Yeah. Rich. Or you're like over it. Yeah. So I think just like making smart choices when you're shopping is the way you could be sustainable. Like you could, nurse said they're all plastic. Yeah. Or like shop. Shop. Fast fashion if you want, but be smart about it. Yeah. Like pick pieces that you actually know you're not gonna like wear twice and throw out. Like actually be smart about, I think we, we buy too quickly. Yes, I agree. Absolutely. Yeah. We're, we're very much give me right now consumers. So we're trying to, I think, take a huge step back from that, especially in the economy that we're in. Yeah. I'm trying to conversation for different days, right. I'm trying to shift into. More of quality than volume. I used to be like, well look at how much I got. Yeah. You know, for $300 versus like this item, or maybe two items that I got for $300 is gonna be in my closet for the next decade. Totally. I don't feel bad about spending money anymore when one, I've worked really hard for it, but two, it's pieces that I know I love and I'm going to wear for years. Like I do not feel bad about it anymore. What I do feel bad about is when I spend a shit ton of money on things like Zara, right? 'cause I'm like, Ugh, I'm going to. Literally have to dry clean this shirt if I want it to stay. Okay. 'cause it will like shrink in the wash. Exactly. And then I'm gonna like throw it out in a year. That's what makes me feel bad. Yeah. So at the end of the day, smart choices and mm-hmm. Sustainable choices when you can in men's goodwill section it men's. Absolutely. Yeah. Okay. Well this was so fun, as always. We, we do, I know. But really quickly, wanted to give you a second. To tell everyone where they can find you on social. Yes. Yes. Yeah. Come find me at how Han sees it for fashion content, honestly, like beauty, wellness, lifestyle, I share everything there. At how Han Sees it, that's Instagram, TikTok, YouTube, literally everywhere. Podcast is on Spotify and Apple. How I see it and then how I see it pod on Instagram, you'll be able to hear Danie and Crystina's episode on how I See. See it. I think they'll link their episode probably in the description. I'll link, you know, this one in mine, but give it a listen. They show their stories and yeah, that's pretty much everything. Yeah. And you, like Danie said, if you haven't listened to the season finale, season two finale of how I see it, please listen to it. I've honestly listened to it twice. Oh my God, that makes me so happy. So once on a drive, I was like driving through like Palm Springs. I'm like, Ooh, this is such a good setting for this. So I turned it on and then I like went back to take notes for the podcast. I'm like, I wanna ask for this and this and this. So. Definitely give it a listen. You. I love Honest Hannah is on her podcast, so definitely. It's a deep reputation. It's a For sure. Yeah. It's a little intense, I'm not gonna lie, but that's me. And so it's that half fashion, half intense. Yeah. Not that episode, but me joke. That episode is intense. Someone I know, someone asked me the other day, they were like, how do you like, how are you successful running? Platforms where it's like half fashion, half mental health, like how does that work? Right. And I was literally like, because it's my most like that is who I am. That is, it's me. It's literally who I am. And that's the only reason why it works. Yeah. It's my most love People love to see people telling the truth. Yeah. It's my most unapologetic self of a, of lover of fashion and a, a deep existential thinker and healer or someone just, and thanks for doing that because I feel like we need more of that it to be for both. Right. Yeah. Yeah. Absolutely. Yeah. Well, thank you guys. I appreciate being here. Thanks. Yeah. Thanks for coming.

empaths-anon_2_04-01-2025_192454 1:00:56

Well, you guys, I hope that you enjoyed our chat with Hannah. She's just, I mean, she is, and it's in the branding. She's very authentic. She's very, tell you how it is. Mm-hmm. But very real. Mm-hmm. And very intuitive, which I really like. I think that's one of the reasons that we were so drawn to her. been nice getting to know her and I think she really does de-stigmatize this. Reputation or this stereotype that influencers get? I was gonna say that she is kind of on her way to redefining Yeah. What it means to influence anyone or anything. Right. Because I think that she's showing how multifaceted everyone can be. Right? Even if you are interested in luxury things and fashion in having an online presence, you decide what that world is for yourself. Right. Mm-hmm. And a good, she does a really good job of showing up authentically and not, I mean, at least as a viewer of her social media, it doesn't ever seem like I'm being pushed to buy all of these things. I feel like what makes some influencers inauthentic is the fact that they're just doing anything to make money. Mm-hmm. And I'm like, girl. Not, like, you're not actually gonna wear that. You're not actually gonna use that. You don't, you know what I mean? That's not part of your actual lifestyle. It's very clear that you just wanted the, the check from Tarte. Got it. You know? Yeah. And she doesn't really give me that. It seems like she's, it's very much putting forth her real interests. Yeah. It's like, this is actually what I am wearing today. This is where I'm going. She like. Breaks it down as like a follow me throughout my day. Yeah. Type of moment. And that just kind of, melts into her podcast because it really is how she views and sees the world. Mm. After being told for so long that her opinion and her voice didn't carry weight or it didn't matter. I think that she's here to be like, fuck that and. Can take accountability for her mistakes along the way. Yeah. Like she says in the episode, as you guys know, she was very chaotic and she said and did things that were, you know, against her own true inner self. Mm-hmm. And so that's when things started to unfold and that is really when stuff happens. She's on the precipice of her Saturn return as well. Yeah. She's right there at the start of it, so I know. Excited. Yeah. I know we've been there. I have an astrologer I can give you. Mm-hmm. But yeah, and I love that she's always doing everything through this lens of. Mental health, and she is very real and raw about what she's going through every day. Mm-hmm. And I think that's refreshing to see in the influencer space and the fashion space, because I think a lot of times we focus on how things look. Mm-hmm. And not how people actually feel. And we're, we're forgetting that they're, that they're really people, right? Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Absolutely. Did you have any other takeaways? No, just that I really enjoyed getting to know her. I really enjoyed how genuine she was in wanting to get to know us as well, on how I see it. Mm-hmm. And I, you know. Crystina and I love a dinner. Like any reason for us to go out and celebrate for no reason we're doing it. And so for her to just extend that invite to say, Hey, like after recording let, let's go grab dinner, let's grab drinks and get to know each other on a more personal level. Oh yeah. Is something that like and oh we did and we did. And take us to a consortium holdings and we will have a Kiki ch baby. We will break it down. Whatever needs to be broken. Yeah, we definitely chatted. We chatted about, more personal things, childhood things, where she was from and how a lot of the time where people are from can really define you as a person and define your personality and how you make choices in your life. And she just hasn't allowed for that because she expanded her mind and she. Really explored different geographical spaces quite literally, and made so many different friends that way. And when you start to get to know people who are not like you, then you really start to understand how beautifully different everyone is and we can embrace and accept each other. And so I think that's something she's really bringing into her overall brand, if you will, is. Being this person who can talk about all the things. So we loved it so much. We hope you guys love it. And if you made it to the end of this episode on YouTube, comment, a high heel shoe. Ooh. Absolutely. And don't forget to check out Hans podcast. You will love it. There's a few episodes recently that I've really, really appreciated and enjoyed, so check out her podcast, check out us on her podcast. Mm-hmm. And we will see you later. Love you. Bye.